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Andre-Pierre Gignac broke his goal drought with a hat trick after undergoing hypnosis

Jurgen Klopp would appreciate it if you didn’t freak out about Ben Woodburn

Santi Cazorla’s clothing is a silent cry for help

Fenerbahce selling shirts with upside down name and number for bicycle kick specialist Moussa Sow

Bob Bradley gets first Premier League win in “stupid” 5–4 thriller against Crystal Palace

YouTubers prove that hiding in Old Trafford toilets overnight to sneak into match isn’t worth it

Montreal can’t draw properly spaced lines, Seattle mocks them

Leicester City advance in Champions League with more wins than they have in the Premier League

Why Jurgen Klinsmann was the best coach the U.S. ever had, by Jurgen Klinsmann

Peterborough player passes to similarly dressed steward

Deloitte report suggests promotion and relegation would be good for U.S. soccer

Pep Guardiola refutes Nasri’s sex restriction claims, says more sex equals better players